Break-ups

You do not have to make someone else wrong to make yourself right!
I have been listening to a friend who is going through a painful breakup and it’s part of the job description to be a good listener when friends are going through difficult times. And I do so willingly, but to a point.
I’m not sure what happened, but the healthier I got with my life, the less tolerant I became of others who don’t make the effort to get their life in order. We all go through challenges, but when the challenge is the same over and over again, it’s time to take a look in the mirror and figure out why we’re making choices that aren’t working for us.
Point in case: my friend went through a divorce a year ago and now breaking up with the love of his life. The stories are nearly the same, just a different person. So I am not as patient this time around.
Are we doing people a favor be listening to their woes when they never change their patterns? Or is it more important to hold up the mirror for them, in a gentle way so they can see what they are doing by choosing their circumstances.
Making the other person the bad guy does not make the other the good guy. Being right does not make the other person wrong.
More important is how we handle each situation. How do we show up for others even when they are not taking the high road? Does it matter ten years from now that you had to be right?
What matters is that we always show up being the best we can muster.